Life Happens . . . so When was the Last Time?

• you licked the beater or spoon coated with raw deliciousness
• you spun around with your arms wide open with your head up until you were dizzy
• you stuck out your tongue to catch raindrops
• you spontaneously fell on your back and made a snow angel
• you let the wind whip through your hair without worrying about tangles
• you sang out loud in the car with the windows open
• you drifted into Neverland
• you made a treat for yourself and decided to give it away
• you laughed at yourself
• you built a sandcastle
• you didn’t seek shelter from the pounding rain
• you cuddled your pillow and sighed
• you smiled, what felt like the width of the ocean, into someone’s eyes without speaking a word
• you let the hands on the clock move without you
• you appreciated something new in familiarity
• you felt the rhythm of your beating heart and changed its tempo
• you stood in the shower longer than needful just to let the water wash over you
• you jumped in a puddle
• you walked a shoreline making your feet sink into the wet sand just so you could watch the water erase your footprint, and then do it again with a deep impression to see how long it would last
• you took off your shoes, wiggled your toes, and laughed
• you bit the bottom of an ice cream cone off so you could suck the ice cream out instead of licking it
• you cried like a baby
• you climbed a tree
• you offered someone a tour within the caverns of your heart
• you skimmed stones trying to exceed your greatest achievement
• you pumped up as high as you dare before jumping off the swing
• you held an embrace
• you felt childlike excitement
• you did something hard
• you smiled at your reflection
• you skinned your knees
• you played in the sandbox of your life
• you chased your imagination
• you used a blade of grass as a whistle
• you forgot you were afraid
• you waited to watch an eclipse, a sunset, a sunrise
• you coloured your nose with stamen powder when stopping to smell the flowers
• you were the only one to laugh at your joke
• you laid under a starry sky
• you enjoyed your own company
• you found yourself in someone else’s eyes
• you stood still to see beyond the visible
• you felt a moment
• you spent quality time getting to know and like yourself?
• you remembered

Where do I begin? I was out for a waterfront walk one day when it started raining. Always loving the rain, I enjoyed watching people try to escape or hide under umbrellas while I looked up, spread my arms and took in every drop. Then the thought, when was the last time, came loud and clear, and I lost myself in moments as the list grew. Did I get soaked? Will I get caught unaware again?

I could say more but written above, and between my heartbeats, my experiences, like water and hand-guided spinning on the potter’s wheel, continually alter my form to shape me. When its changes reach through thundering downpouring storm-blasted lessons, drenching receptive pores, or bubbles like crystal blobs of clarity resting on bare skin to bring awareness of what is truly important (determined individually), I stand still and listen within myself.

One day I will be someone I could not imagine, a perfect harmony of my choices and chastisements playing the embodiment of my life, singing in tune within my blossoming heart. Until then, I remember difficult, inspirational and pivotal moments. I struggle and soar, drift and float, walk and run, bathe in the rain, seek shady relief from the blazing sun, choke and exhale, stop and inhale.

This time, the soft rain brought a torrent of precious memories, reminding me what and who I cherish, the treasures of my heart. Rarely far distant happenings, the last times of my childlike exuberance repeat themselves where opportunity exists, becoming a more recent bookmark in the story of my life. Special one-on-one moments await a ‘last’ time when the previously designated one becomes an integral part of my life’s chapters.

Here is what I have learned through the last four-plus years.
Each breath, a reason for the gift.
Reach, search, find, feel, express, love, and live passionately.
I only have this life, once around from birth to death.

It is mine,
a gift to unwrap
layer upon layer
helped by the
encouraging, instructing, and enriching hands
of those
I encounter
and
love.

I love the rain,
fierce or gentle,
experienced drop by drop,
unknown to me its particular purpose,
yet
I need not flee or hide
because
I will not melt
or
fade away
into a puddle of water.
My body and soul remain.
Enjoy the laughter and the tears.
Remember the last time begins anew
with each morning’s breath
until
slumbering in renewing respite.

Rain mists the distance.